The Everyday Life of Hades
by Journalist793
Summary: This is a look through Hades eyes. You ever wonder why Hades is always in a bad mood? This is a way to find out. I'm sorry that this is a bad summary, but please review. Now featuring: Zeus, Artemis, and Hermes!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer- I don't own PJO and I'm glad I don't. If I wrote those books they would really suck.

The Story of the Everyday Life in the Underworld

It was my least favorite time of the year, summertime. Although I pretty much hate all of the year, summertime was even worse. It was bad enough that my only companions were dead people. But this is the time of year that my own wife leaves me! What a rip off! I get a wife for six months a year. _Six months!_ People say I'm grumpy, but wouldn't you be if you had my job!

I hate my job. I wanted to become a doctor or astronaut, but no. Just because I lost a game of draw straws, I'm stuck here.

I sighed and got up to do my walk through my kingdom. I passed my mutated dog with three heads. Instead of growling at everything like he used to, he just whined like a sad puppy and clung to a broken, shriveled rubber ball. He had acted like this ever since that dumb nephew of mine came and asked for a lightning bolt, which, I may add in, was not taken by me! I think it was that kid Luke, but nobody tells me much of anything.

 I walked until I spotted the only bright colored thing in my entire land: a palace. It had a grand bedroom, twelve guest rooms, three bathrooms, a kitchen, a grand dining hall, and a pony stable in the back. It was the house of my little girl, Bianca. She was tended to by invisible servants, and had slumber parties every week with the rest of her dead friends. She was pretty much my year-round Persephone. I walked into the house. Bianca was baking some muffins while three souls about her age were helping her. They were giggling and talking about who the cutest soul in the underworld was… which was Paris. All of the girls were gathered around one bowl of muffin mix. One of Bianca's friends named Tiffany accidentally flicked some Muffin mix on Bianca. Bianca laughed and flicked some back, but missed Tiffany and hit Stacy. Stacy, who had been contributing the chocolate chips, smiled and threw and handful of chocolate chips at Mandy, who got a few of them in her mouth and got a face full of chocolate due to the rest. I cleared my throat as they giggled. The girls turned and noticed me for the first time. Tiffany, Stacy, and Mandy all bowed. Bianca smiled and waved. "Hi dad!" she said.

"Good day, Lord Hades," said the other three in Unison.

"Hello girls," I said. "Is it sleepover night?" I asked Bianca.

She smiled. "Yep! We were making some muffins for tonight. You wouldn't believe what they're showing on Haphaestus TV tonight. A marathon of that old Hercules TV show that got canceled. We're gonna watch it until dawn breaks."

I half smiled. My daughter was the only one who could bring joy into my life. And she stayed year-round, unlike a certain goddess of spring I could mention. "Well, you girls have fun with that. Save me a muffin."

"Okay, dad."

"Yes, lord Hades."

I left the little palace and sighed. Now that the only enjoyable part of my day was over, I would have to go check on the other stuff. I went into the torture chambers. I walked over to a card table where one of my least favorite souls was sitting. Gabe Ugliano. One of the reasons I hated this guy was because, hey let's be honest, this dude reeked! He smelled like moldy pizza and cigarettes and beer and dead rat _and, _to top it off, dead people. His curse was that he was strapped into a chair that was really a cactus, play poker with a bunch of my skeleton minions while listening to opera, and no matter how many times he would play he would never win. I told him that the wager was that if he won, he could go back to the living world, and I would even strike up a deal with Aphrodite that would drive Sally Jackson back into his arms, but if he lost, his eyelashes would be plucked out one by one, only to grow back during the next game. He took the wager and said that he could already smell sally's bean dip. Now he was trapped in a never-ending world of pain.

"Hades," growled Gabe, "you just wait and see, I've got this game in the bag. He smiled and drew a card, but then looked at it and frowned. "No!" he shouted. His cactus chair was wheeled away behind a curtain. Then I began hearing his yelps of pain and torment. I walked away, very sad. So far my day had gotten me nowhere.


	2. The Everyday Life of Zeus

The Everyday Life of Zeus

It is so hard to be me. You would not believe how stressful my life is, with my wife always nagging me and my kids always fighting, I ought to win a trophy and become "Dad Of The Year", but no. I just get more complaints and nagging.

My wife always moans on about how unnoticed and unloved she feels, just because I had kids with a couple thousand other woman doesn't mean she's not my true love, but she always tells me how any man would say that and how I don't really listen to her, but before she can go on I fire up my ipod and shout over the music "What's that, dear? I can't hear you." Hera will usually just slap me and move on.

The kids are always complaining. "Dad, Hermes stole my cows again." "Dad, Apollo is hitting on my hunters again." "Dad, Ares is being an idiot again," And so on and so forth. Hey, I don't mean to complain but seriously, do I look like a supreme god who can do almost anything by waving my hand here? Well, you know what I mean.

Today was a day just like any other. I got up out of bed and went to the kitchen. Hermes and Athena were at the kitchen table fighting over a box of Lucky Charms.

"Come on!" shouted Hermes, pulling on the box. "I didn't get enough hourglass marshmallows!"

"They're just hourglasses!" shouted Athena, "and I haven't gotten nearly enough balloon marshmallows! Do you want me to go through the day without my recommended filling of balloon marshmallows?"

"If it gets me my hourglasses, then yes," said Hermes.

"Kids," I sighed, "sharing is caring, and if you don't start caring about each other, then Gaia help me I will ground you for a century."

"Fine," said Athena, crossing her arms. "I'll be the mature one here. Hermes, you can have your dumb hourglasses."

Hermes smiled and began pouring cereal.

I sighed and ordered one of my invisible servants to grill up some pancakes, and went into the living room. I sat down in my easy chair and pulled out the _Olympian Times_ and read about how good the ratings were for the Percy channel on Hephaestus TV. Great, now my nephew's going to get a big head. My pancakes were delivered just then. As I ate them, I remembered the horrifying news about today: I had a marriage counseling session with Hera. Drat, I hate marriage counseling. Our counselor is a woman who might as well join Artemis's hunters; because she thinks that men are the root of all evil and that I am their leader (although I technically am).

Hera walked into the room. "Hey, honey! Do you know what today is?"

I sighed. "Marriage counseling."

"Exactly!" she said.

Why is she always so perky? I got up and mumbled something about how happy I was we were going through this, which was a lie, of course, and left the room. "We're leaving in two hours!" called Hera after me.

As I left, Hermes threw down an hourglass marshmallow and shouted "Marshmallow Power!"

"You know that you can't really control time with those things, right?" said Athena.

"Aww man!" said Hermes, "false advertising!"

Athena rolled her eyes, "Why is my life cursed with idiots," she muttered as she got up and put some bread in a toaster.

I went into the garden, and since it was summertime Demeter and Persephone were out there gardening. Demeter grew some instant baby's breath while Persephone grew some pomegranates, her favorite fruit.

"Hey, Demeter," I said glumly.

Demeter stood up and studied me. "Someone looks sad today. Marriage counseling?"

I nodded sadly.

"I'm so sorry," said Persephone.

I left the girls to their gardening and found Apollo. "Hey, dad," he said, "I was wondering if I could borrow some money. I need to refill my sun chariot with gas, and the prices these days are going through the roof!"

"Son," I said, "If you want to keep that chariot of yours you're going to have to be able to pay for it."

"But dad!" he whined, "It's not my fault that the mortals are using up all of the fuel. They are so inconsiderate of us Olympians!"

"Well look on the bright side," I said, "maybe in a few millennia they'll evolve into something with worthy intelligence!"

Apollo laughed, "Yeah, sure dad."

I decided to leave before Apollo remembered that he wanted some money and headed back towards the palace. Just before I entered the building, I heard a fluttering noise behind me. I turned to see my son Hermes fluttering in the air with his mailbag. "You've got mail!" he said, and handed me a letter. It was addressed from the hunters, so I guessed it was from.

I went into the palace and sat down on my bed. When I opened the letter, I was surprised not to see Artemis's handwriting. The letter said:

Dear Dad,

Hi! How's it going up on Olympus? I am fine. I just got promoted to head of the hunters because I was able to kill a beast that none of the other hunters could (except Lady Artemis could have killed it easily). Anyway, I was hoping that you could give me a little help. Since you are the king of gods and most powerful, I was hoping that you would grant the hunters and I some luck, because we are after this really fast, strong, and big monster that always seems to be able to be able to slip away. Maybe you could help me to defeat it. Please help, the hunters and I are desperately looking for a way to teach this monster a thing or two.

From Your Daughter,

Thalia

I smiled and put the letter on to a bedside table. I decided that later I would answer the prayer, but not today. I turned around to face the clock on the wall and realized that I would have to leave in a few minutes for marriage counseling. Olympian time flies much too fast.

Right on cue, Hera walked into he room. She was so happy that today was yet another day to make me miserable. I glumly walked out of the palace with her and loaded myself into the chariot. Hera got in the drivers seat and turned the key.

"Really, honey," she said as the engine started, "This is for our own good."

"Uh huh," I said, not believing her.

As we reached the mortal world, the chariot turned into a golden Lamborghini. I was feeling so down that it started to rain. The chariot parked in front of a dull-looking business office.

We got out of the car and went into the front door. The lady at the front desk looked bored out of her wits. Hera walked right past her and loaded herself into the elevator. I got in and sadly pushed the button with the 7 on it. After a minute of hearing freeform jazz elevator music, we were at floor seven and in the room that belonged to Dr. Beth.

As I walked in, Dr. Beth smiled at Hera and gave me the evil eye. "How have things been?" asked Dr. Beth when we sat down.

That was all that Hera needed to get her started. She began ranting about how I had done so many wrong things. I wanted to shout out "I'M JUST A PERSON", but I knew that Dr. Beth would get all over my case about how I shouldn't interrupt my wife while she's talking.

After a few more minutes of Hera ranting, me protesting, and Dr. Beth agreeing with everything that Hera said, I was sent out of the room so that Hera and Dr. Beth Could talk alone. They talked for an hour, and then Hera came out and said, "We're leaving now."

"Don't I get a chance to talk?" I asked.

Hera said grimly, "She disagreed with something I said."

"Huh?" I asked. I walked and looked into the office, despite Hera's protests, and saw, instead of Dr. Beth, a peacock standing in the center of the room.

I turned to Hera with a raised eyebrow. Then I smiled at her and said, "You're right, we should get back home."

As we drove away in the chariot, I smiled to myself. Today had been a very successful day.

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**I hope you liked it! I'm going to be doing a lot of the gods, but put in your reviews the gods/goddesses that you want to see in the next few chapters. Thanks for reading! **


	3. The Everyday Life of Artemis

The Everyday Life of Artemis

I hate it when my girls fight. I also hate my brother, and monsters that I can't kill. I could go on all day about stuff I hate, but you would get seriously bored.

My hunters do okay most of the time, except for when a boy comes along or if a disagreement occurs. Having a bunch of virgins traveling in one group is surprisingly difficult. They always find something to disagree on. I give them treats; catch them up-to-date with the mortals a lot, but things seem to never go right! When I brought them to a baseball game, Thalia and Phoebe got into an argument over who was better: The Giants or the Red Sox. When I took them to a Lakers game, Thalia's favorite team, an unfair foul was called on the Lakers and Thalia actually got onto the court and slapped the referee! It took a lot of mist manipulation to get her out of that one. I even turned one police officer into a jackalope. Good times, good times.

My brother is just about as annoying as a boy can get. Every now and then he comes to "check up on me", which is code for him checking out my hunters. The first time, Thalia blushed when he came around. I gave her a stern talking to, reminded her that she was a virgin, and that cured her. Now she is just as disgusted by boys as the rest of my hunters are. Apollo always calls me his little sister, which annoys the Hades out of me more than anything else. Just because I look thirteen doesn't mean I'm younger. Actually, if any of you know the story, we are twins, I was born first and as a newborn I helped my mother deliver my brother! I usually want to tell him that but I don't think it's best to mention that in front of my girls.

The third and final things that I hate most are monsters that you just can't seem to kill. I mean, it's not that I'm complaining about actually having a challenge because these laistrygonians and hellhounds are just getting old after a couple thousand years, but come on! We've been searching for this thing for weeks! It's the chimera, pretty hard to kill with just arrows. Hunting it day after day is just nerve-racking! The serpent tail is poison, the goat body is armored, and, of course, the lion head just _has_ to breath fire. To top it all of, this thing's got moves. It can move fifteen feet per second! Let's see you do that.

Now that I'm done rambling to you about the things that I hate I had better get a move on.

I sighed and got ready for the hunt. I snapped my fingers and my bag started packing on it's own, with my tent going in first and the rest of my possessions on top. When it was nothing but a backpack that weighed about three pounds, I slung it over my shoulder and began walking around the camp. First I stopped in Thalia's tent. She was rocking out on Guitar Hero 3 (Yes, my tents have electricity), playing The devil went down to Georgia and whooping some virtual boy's butt. Every now and then her silver circlet in her hair, the mark of the hunters leader, would threaten to tip off. She was bobbing her head as if in tuned to the music. I rolled my eyes and smiled, thinking about how Apollo would have done the same thing.

As soon as the song was over, I cleared my throat to get her attention. She turned to me and bowed. "Hello, Lady Artemis."

"Good morning, Thalia," I answered. "Start packing up the tent, we're going after the chimera, _again_."

Thalia groaned and looked around the room. Since she was not a god, she would have to pack up herself.  I looked around the horribly dirty room. Scattered on the floor was a lot of her anime books. It turns out that Thalia is a freak for Death Note, always watching it on her TV and reading the books and all of that. She even started her own Death Note, starting with Kronos, then Luke, then Phoebe, and a lot more people that she has problems with. She also had a bunch of video games, dirty clothes, and some stuff I am not comfortable mentioning on the floor. I shuddered and walked out of the tent.

After visiting the rest of the tents and spread the news that we would be leaving, Thalia came up to me, struggling with her pack, and handed me a piece of paper. "Will you put this in Hermes overnight express for dad?" she asked

I nodded. I didn't send letters to our dad often, but I guess Thalia had something important to say to him. I went to the other side of the camp, where none of the girls could disturb me, and called for my half-brother, Hermes.

Hermes came down on his flying shoes and said, "Hey, Artemis! I haven't seen you since the solstice. How you been?"

"Oh, fine. A chimera's getting kind of annoying, but I can handle it."

"_That's good to hear," _said a voice from Hermes' pocket. It was Martha.

_"Rats are delicious,"_ said another voice. George was almost as annoying as Apollo. Just like any other boy.

Hermes pulled out his cell phone and glared at the snakes. "I thought I put you on vibrate," said Hermes.

_"George hacked the system and took us off vibrate," _said Martha. George shot a glare at Martha, which must have been harder than it looked considering they were tied together.

Hermes flicked George in the head and put the phone in his pocket. Then he turned to me. "What can I do for ya, sis?"

I handed Hermes the letter and said, "Message for dad."

Hermes nodded, but didn't leave. "That'll be three drachmas," he said to me.

"Family discount?" I asked hopefully. Hermes thought it over. Since I was in a little girl's body, I figured that I might try the "cute look". I stuck my lower lip and got my eyes to shine as best I could.

Hermes tried to look away, but couldn't. He struggled in the air. "No, not that again!" he said.

_"Oh, just give her the discount!" _came Martha's muffled voice.

Hermes sighed and said, "Fine!" He turned around and flew away.

I smiled, very pleased with myself, and went back to camp. It was about noon, so I figured that we should leave.

When I got to the tents, I called for all of the girls to come out. The seven of them got in a line up like an army. It started with Thalia, then Phoebe, Claire, Minerva, Holly, Mandy, and at the end was the newest recruit, a seven-year-old named Miranda who was afraid of catching cooties. I gave the girls a little pep talk, handed out some sandwiches for lunch, and then we got a move on.

As we walked, I told Phoebe to think up some plans on how to attack this monster. She pulled out a notepad and an old, withered pencil. Thalia eyed the pencil suspiciously. "Does that have lead in it?" she asked suspiciously.

Phoebe looked towards Thalia. "Yes," she said cautiously.

Thalia raised an eyebrow. "You do know that they stopped using actual lead in pencils, like, two years ago to prevent lead poisoning, right?"

Phoebe shrugged and looked back down. I walked some more, keeping a sharp eye out for the beast.

After half an hour of hiking, there was loud growl and a serpent came out of the trees and snapped at us. We all had our bows out in ten seconds flat. The serpent looked around for the weakest link, and then spotted Miranda. He lunged for her, opening his large mouth wide. Instead of crying and running away like a regular seven-year-old would do, Miranda shot her arrow straight into the things mouth. It stopped mid-attack and just hovered there in front of us, frozen in disbelief. Thalia and Phoebe exchanged confused looks. After about ten seconds of awkward silence, the girls started shooting a volley of arrows. I looked to my left and realized that there was the head of a lion watching the fight. The chimera's tail hit the ground and disintegrated into dust.

This probably really ticked off the chimera, because the lion head roared and jumped at us, revealing its goat body. I signaled my hunters to fire at it, but their arrows only bounced off of him. He landed and smirked at us, then started roaring. "Phoebe? Thalia? Anyone got a plan?"

That was when Thalia jumped in. She had that bright look in her eyes that told you she had an evil plan. "Phoebe," she shouted over the roar, "give me your pencil."

"What are you going to do, write a will?" asked Phoebe sarcastically as the lion closed his mouth.

"Just hand it over!" yelled Thalia, as the chimera got ready to charge. Phoebe tossed Thalia pencil. Then Thalia notched it onto her bow.

"What are you doing?" I asked, as the monster came at us barfing up fire.

"Something Percy taught me," replied Thalia. She let the string go and the pencil flew right into the fire. The wooden pencil part caught on fire, but the lead on the inside just melted and passed into the chimera's stomach. It smiled at us as if to say, "Oh, that was your plan?" but then his face got a strange look. It began to whimper and it threw itself against the dirt. It had been poisoned by the lead in the pencil. It kicked a few more times, but then it got very still and just laid on the ground.

"It's dead?" asked Minerva.

Holly nodded. She turned to me and said, "Lady Artemis, we should skin the beast before it disintegrates. These bigger monsters may take longer, but our time is still limited.

I nodded in agreement. "Bring out your knives, girls, we have some dirty work to do."

An hour later we were making our way to the nearest clearing proudly carrying a bloody pelt. We had decided not to take the meat in fear that we would get poisoned, but the pelt could become helpful when the winter struck. Even though it was early, we started a campfire to celebrate our victory. I brought out some hotdogs on sticks and handed them to each of the girls. As we drank our nectar, we toasted to Thalia and decided that the pelt should go to her.

"Great," she said, "another thing to clean up."

I decided that we would all take the night off from hunting and have sort of a party. We all went to Thalia's tent and had a guitar hero match, roasted some marshmallows, and just sat back and had at least one normal night. I called lights out around midnight. Tomorrow we would be going after the Loch Ness Monster.


	4. The Everyday Life of Hermes

**The Everyday Life of Hermes**

Let's get something straight. I deserve a paycheck no matter what my dad tells you. Whenever I ask him for one he goes all, "No, son, your paycheck is living on Olympus," and then I'm all, "Dad! Then why are you giving all of the other Olympians paychecks for doing nothing?" That's when he grits his teeth and says, "No! They have very important jobs!"

As if. Aphrodite has a pass time. Hephaestus has a hobby. Artemis has one huge vacation. Apollo has the privilege to drive. Athena dances through life with her brains and everything. What do I have? I have an employment, to carry the mail to and fro.

Dad says, "Son, your reward is the Ambrosia that renews you immortality." Okay, so I have to work for this stuff while all Aphrodite has to do is walk into the room and say, "Hi Daddy!"

Gods, that old man is so annoying. And it's not like he ever says thank you.

And then there's my kids to worry about. I have a psycho son who convinced himself that I don't love him, a set of twins, and a whole cabin full of kids who rob banks on a weekly basis. I am so-o not paid enough.

And, to make matters worse, I have two ratty snakes that act like children that I have to carry around all day.

This morning, once I woke up, I got out of bed and went to the kitchen to see Athena HOGGING the Lucky Charms. "No!" I shouted, "Those are MINE! MINE I TELL YOU!"

Athena, who was digging through her bowl counting up how many rainbow marshmallows she had, ignored me. I chose this opportunity to grab the box of cereal. "Hey!" she protested and grabbed the end of the box as I poured. She yanked it closer to her but I kept my grip. "Come on!" I shouted and started complaining about my lack of hourglass marshmallows.

Athena sniffed indignantly, protested about how she was missing out on rainbows until dad threatened to ground us and I got the box! That was a pretty good thing about my day.

As dad left grumbling about marriage counseling and my evil step mother, Hera, went to get her nails done, I finished up breakfast with Athena insulting my intelligence every five minutes. Finally she finished and said, "I gotta go, my turn to coach the game."

"Oh yeah," I said, swirling my spoon around in my bowl, "How are the wise huntresses doing?" I guess you're confused right now. Athena and Artemis teamed up to make a soccer team, like other Olympians. The Wise Huntresses were playing the championship game today against the Shining Warriors, a team managed by Apollo and Ares. I sighed into my bowl, because Ares was coaching for the Shining Warriors today, not Apollo. That meant I had no time to rob him of his cows. Dang.

Athena shrugged. "I've got a plan. We're sure to beat those losers today."

Ares, who was eaves dropping at the door, foolishly stepped in. "Yeah right!" he exclaimed, passing gas as he did, which made me regret letting Hera serve us chilly last night. "There is no way a bunch of sissy _girls_ are gonna beat us!"

He might've taunted her more, but Athena had jabbed a spear into his thigh. "You were saying?" she asked, giving the spear a twist to allow the ichor to pour out.

Ares screamed in his throat, pulled out a sword, andtried to scare off Athena. He swung at her, but she ducked, pulled the spear out of his leg, and jabbed again in… umm… do I really have to say it?

Ares screamed a shrill, girly scream and swung at Athena's stomach, but it just clanked off of her. My sister was paranoid and always wore her armor.

I was on the edge of my seat, now, eating Lucky Charms as if it were popcorn.

Athena gave a final blow to the head, and walked off with her nose in the air. Ares curled up on the floor whimpering like an injured puppy. I put my bowl in the sink and scooted away, not wanting to be the subject of Hera's ranting when she came home and felt so sorry for her "poor baby".

I grabbed my mail bag which was magic so that everytime someone sent a letter to me when I'm not wearing it, the letter would appear in the bag. But when I was wearing it, I had to go get the letter. UGH! Thanks A LOT dad.

I flew around and delivered the usual mail. "Jury duty for Zeus," I laughed, dropping a letter in his mail box.

I reached in and pulled out a pink envelope that smelled like goat. "Another love note to Artemis from Grover Underwood?" I said, bewildered. I dropped the pink sheet in a shredder like Artemis had instructed me too. After a week of nonstop letters, it had gotten to be too much for her.

I heard voices coming from my pocket. _It's my hourglass marshmallow_ said a male voice.

_Haha, yeah right,_ said a female_, now fork it over, Curious George._

I opened the bag and pulled out George and Martha. "What are you doing," I sighed.

_Martha took my Luck Charms Marshmallow,_ Complained Georg, _and she bit me when I took it back._

"That's it," I said, pressing the vibrate button. Martha tried to shout "NO!" but she couldn't say anything. Then I took the marshmallow and popped in my mouth. "Now it's mine," I taunted, swallowing the colorful lump of sugar. I dropped my phone in my bag just as an alarm on my watch went off. Artemis was summoning me.

Let's skip to a little while after that and say that I made lots of money after my delivery to Artemis. HA, yeah, and I didn't give is too her free if that's what you're thinking.

Well, anyway, I gave the letter to dad and hung up my mail bag. I did not want to deliver anything else, so I strolled into the throne room which was empty.

My god of thieves senses kicked in as I looked around the room. Smiling I ran to Dad's throne and picked up his lightning bolt. "Hermes!" I shouted. "You no longer have to deliver mail. You are free to lounge about while I make Aphrodite the messenger of the gods."

I set down the lightning bolt and ran to Aphrodite's throne, picking up the golden gridle, Aphrodite's symbol of power. "Like, daddy," I said falsetto, "That is like, so unfair. You should make Hermes master god."

I ran back to Zeus's throne and took up the bolt. "Right you are. Hermes, I am retiring. You may now be King of all Gods... and you have permission to cast your evil stepmother into Tartaraus."

Then I ran back to the middle of the room and said, "Gee thanks dad!"

Someone behind me cleared their throat. I turned and came face to face with Dad.

"Oh, hi dad," I said nervously. Dad rose an eyebrow and we stood in awkward silence. "Umm," Is said, "How much of the did you hear?"

"Well," said dad, his eyes filled with disapproval. "About from 'Hermes, you no longer have to deliver mail.'"

I gulped. "Umm, say dad. Did you ever notice that the word 'Deliver' sounds like taking out someone's liver? Because the suffix 'De' means remove and liver as in the organ in your body."

Dad was not amused. "It could be dangerous, mimicking the gods like that. As a punishment, I'm going to deduct money from your paycheck."

My jaw dropped. "Dad!" I said, "I don't get a paycheck!"

"Well now you don't," he responded.

"I never did," I argued, bewildered.

"Don't you give me that back sass, young man. Go to your room."

I shook my head, kicked at my flying sandal, and flew off. I only stopped once on the way to my room to steal a cow of Apollo's while he was watching a nymph trying to get out of a tree with her skirt caught in it. I named the cow Anna when I got to my room. As I sat there, daydreaming, I figured that my day had been pretty successful.


End file.
